Being abroad never fails to make me think about love. It makes me realize that deep down, deep, deep down in the dark abyss of my lonely heart I DO want love and I DO hope that I find love… something about traveling and being alone…
I am a Virgin
“Do you have a boyfriend?”
I used to dread this question because it would inevitably lead to my admitting that I never had a boyfriend. This confession would then be followed by the question, “Are you gay/a lesbian?” Huh? No. How does never having been in a relationship equate to being a lesbian? Why would anyone assume that? The first time I was confronted like this I was so shocked. Is society so afraid of being alone/single that it automatically assumes there’s something not quite right about you? (I am neither a homophobe nor do I have anything against gays. Several of my friends are gay and they’re some of the coolest people.) This issue boggled my mind for many years to the point where I started wondering if something was wrong with me. And then, I met many women out there who have never had a boyfriend. Women who have not had their first kiss; women who are even much older than me; smart, beautiful, strong, driven women. I can’t explain the relief I felt. I always thought I was the odd ball, but I’m not! Yay! If you’ve never had a boyfriend or girlfriend don’t fret. There’s nothing wrong with you. It isn’t because you aren’t lovable, likable, or wanted.
Which brings me to another point. Sex. Yes, I am a virgin and I have friends who are and aren’t as well. I am a virgin by choice and not because I can’t seem to find someone to have a one night stand with. It isn’t because no one wants to have sex with me so, please, please, please don’t take me to a bar and try to hook me up. One of my ex-coworkers attempted to do this and I’ll give him credit for trying. I had a really fun night in Hong Kong, but I did not hook up with anyone and the only action that I got were old men trying to dance with me, someone grabbing my boobs, and some guy with really stinky breath trying to kiss me. But no one will be able to force me to do something I don’t want to do.
Besides, when did being a virgin become something to frown upon? I’m sure there are many people who would disagree with me about having sex and argue that I am missing out. But I don’t feel like I am. I don’t know where this is going, so I’ll end here. I agree sex is a good thing. I just want to wait until after I get married.
P.S. Photo is from a project I did back in high school which was so long ago!
Sunset Beach
You know how no two snowflakes are the same? I think the same goes for sea shells. There are some that look similar, but I’ve never seen a shell that looks exactly like another one. Plus, they’re pretty and you can keep them forever, unlike snowflakes. I used to think that falling snow looked like huge snowflakes, you know, like in the cartoons and movies. The first time I saw actual snow falling was when I was in junior high and at first, I didn’t know what was going on outside until someone told me it was snowing… I was so disappointed! I couldn’t even tell each snowflake was unique and they were tiny! And, it got everywhere! I felt cheated. Doesn’t mean I don’t like playing in the snow, though!
Today, I spent my day at Sunset Beach frolicking in the ocean and picking sea shells. I also ate the fattest and heaviest burrito/wrap of my life! It was so heavy I had to hold it vertically with the bottom of it resting on my plate while I ate it. Don’t you hate it when your burrito ends up ripping open and all the juices, beans, and rice start spilling out leaving a trail from your fingertips to your elbows?! That sums up my lunch. It was one delicious mess. It was filled with butternut squash, avocados, rice, beans, melted cheese, and other things that were all jumbled together. Yummy goodness. I was overcome with hunger that I didn’t even think of taking a photo of it. But enjoy the picture of the shells!
Mellow Monday | Music Monday
Mellow music for a mellow day.
Foreign Fields – “Little Lover”
Lyrics:
Little lover
When you look at me now
Just like your mother does
Oh, I don’t mind the time
Oh, I don’t mind the time
Little lover
Yeah, we’ll all lose ourselves
To one another
But I’m holdin’ on to you
Then you’ll discover
All my soul
All these lights I’ve held to
They lost you
Oh
Now that you know
What I couldn’t show you
Take it away
Oh
Now that you see
What I’ve kept in hiding
Take it away
Take it away
Take it away
Little lover
Will you think of me now
Just like your mother did?
Oh
Now that you know
What I couldn’t show you
Take it away
Oh
Now that you see
What I’ve kept in hiding
Take it away
Take it away
Take it away
I never realized
Rearrange in the back of your eyes
Press me down and hold my face
Hold me slow
What I hear is change
It’ll be okay
You take me away
You take me away
You take me away
The “What if’s” of fear
Doubt. This 5 letter word has the capability of rendering people incapable. It makes our fears accumulate into a black cloud we can’t run away from, shrivels up dreams until they’re nothing but withered saplings. It leaves us with nothing but missed opportunities and a whole lot of regret. A boring life. This is not a place anyone wants to be, but sometimes we just can’t help it. Or, can we?
What if we took our fears and flipped them upside down? What if, instead of thinking about the obstacles and all the difficulties we have to face to reach a goal–or whatever it is–we focus on the end result and what has been promised? I believe that every person has been promised certain things by God and He fulfills those promises at His own timing. I know, you might be thinking, “Well, what about the people starving in Africa or girls who are forced into drugs and prostitution?” I don’t have a definite answer to this but sometimes, we make series of bad choices which can lead us to a place we never wished. I struggle with this question, too and I’ve heard various answers but I can never explain it in my own words. We just need to put our part into it and remember that God never goes back on His word. When things get difficult or seem impossible, let this be an encouragement and keep pushing forward.
Often times, we tend to focus on the very small, trivial part and forget that it’s part of a much bigger picture. I’m trying not to dwell on my circumstances and obstacles, but set my sights on what has been promised to me. It ain’t easy and I’m going to be honest, I’m not absolutely certain what those promises are, but as I journey through my life, one by one, they’ll be revealed to me. I feel extremely lucky to be surrounded by pastors and friends who continually fill me with wise words and encouragements. Even from friends who live in different countries! ♡
So, surround yourself with people who are uplifting and BE uplifting to others! No one wants that negative energy! And if you are currently in a dark place, think about how you can change your what if’s of fear into something positive. It’s easy to sulk in our fears and doubt, but why would you take the easy route when there’s something so much better waiting for you by putting in some effort?
P.S. Do you like the photo of the flower? I was in my backyard and just messing around with my camera. Hehe. Told ya I’d dig out my DSLR from the deep, dark corner of my closet and put it to use. I thought it depicted our what if’s of fear and what it can do to us. Let’s not end up like that. Let’s be vibrant flowers that exude happiness and joy in people and ourselves.
Photos I meant to post earlier
From sea to shining sea.
Wolf & Crane Bar. What am I looking at?
Wolf & Crane Bar
Out of focus. Looking down and hoping in doing so I won’t be in the picture. FYI I love all of my water bottles. I never leave the house without one.
Drinking
“Let me take a photo of you blowing out smoke.”
Hi guys! I meant to share these in my earlier post “A Day in LA,” but I wanted to get the okay from my friend, Mike, who took these. I’m trying to convince him to make a blog for his photos… One of the drawbacks of shooting with film cameras is you can’t tell how the pictures are going to turn out albeit they’re nostalgic and make you feel super cool. So, even though I remember him using an entire roll of film and more, not all of them made the cut.
I love the way these came out. Some people don’t like the noise/graininess in photos, but I think it adds a nice touch. Of course, it depends on the subject of the photograph as well. Just in case you’re wondering, Mike used a Canon AE-1 with the film, Kodak Portra 800. The high ISO causes the noise in the pictures, which I really like. Sorry, I couldn’t post these earlier!
P.S. Mike, if you ever read this, thanks for letting me share these! Start a blog!
Good Friends
Have you ever seen or heard of the children’s musical Wee Sing in Sillyville? I enjoyed it as a child, but if I were to watch it again now, I most likely would think it’s a little creepy and weird. I can’t remember the first time I saw it on VHS, but some of the songs have stuck with me over the years. I used to have so much fun watching VHS’s being rewinded in our sports car tape rewinder. I was and still am easily amused. For those of you wondering, it used to look similar to this one:
One of the songs that has stuck with me ever since is “Make New Friends.” And I am not kidding you, I only just found out it’s actually a nursery rhyme… All these years I’ve always thought it was a unique song to the musical! I was trying to find a YouTube video of the song and realized it’s actually a rhyme… Am I the only one who was not aware of this? If you didn’t know about this either, well, now you do. You’re welcome.
The song below, by Emily King is for all the friends we have in our lives. Life would be so boring without friends. Let them know how much you appreciate them! Share this song with them! You can even download it for FREE! Happy friday to you and enjoy. As for me, I’m going to find something to eat. I am so hungry. xoxo
A day in LA
I don’t know if it’s because I live in the suburbs, a.k.a. middle of nowhere, but I always feel like I need to drive at least 20 minutes to have some kind of fun. Sure, it’s not about where you are, but who you’re with, but most days I’m alone and venturing out alone doesn’t exactly make me all giddy and excited to explore the mundaneness around me. It’s unfortunate. But then I wonder if it would be any different if I did live somewhere like, New York City, Seattle, or even Los Angeles. Wouldn’t it just become normal to me after a while and no longer thrill me? I hope not…
So, to relinquish this craving of exploring a big city and trying to be cool (Ha! What am I saying? I am cool, pft.), some friends and I spent a day out in Los Angeles. The day didn’t go quite as planned, however. We had a really late lunch that prevented us from going to the Getty Villa. So, we decided to visit the Museum of Contemporary Art, but it was closed that day and we didn’t find out until we got there. But! All hope was not lost. We got to go to the Santa Monica Pier* and hang around Little Tokyo. Here are some polaroids we took on the pier. Don’t mind the reflections on the film. My scanner broke ages ago and I never felt the need to buy another one so, I took photos of the polaroids, instead.
Hmm… I really need to whip out my DSLR from the depths of my closet and put it to good use! These films don’t do justice to our day trip to LA!
*On a side note: I adore the Santa Monica Pier. I don’t know why, but I do. And once, when I was bored at home, I had this sudden urge to go on the viking boat ride that’s there. So, I drove over an hour, paid for parking, and walked to the pier only to see that it was closed for the night!!! I was devastated and mentally kicked myself for not thinking to check the hours beforehand. Since then, I have not been able to go on this particular viking boat, but I will one day!
Let’s talk eggs | Let eggs talk
Eggscuse me, I’m not talking about the reproductive eggs here. I’m talking about the eggs that come from hens and make awesome omelettes. Yummmmmmmy! I usually buy my eggs from Costco because everything is bigger and better at Costco. Plus everything just feels cheaper. It was from my most recent eggs purchase at Costco that I first encountered an egg with two yolks. Wait, what? Is that even possible? Yes, it is. I was completely clueless to this until I actually cracked an egg and was like,
“What the heck?
Why are there two yolks?
Is it safe to eat this?
Man, another yolk means more cholesterol…
Oh well, might as well eat it.
But I feel so bad!
This egg could have been twin chicks!”
I was feeling so much guilt about eating an egg. And I had my doubts about the hen that laid the egg, too. What if it had some kind of deformity or disease that caused it to lay weird, mutated eggs. What if I became a mutant like the X-Men?! That’d be pretty cool, but I was scared for my life.
As I started frying my egg I was skeptical about whether or not it would be edible or if it would cause food poisoning. I put my life on the line eating this egg! As it turns out, it’s perfectly safe to eat. 1 in 1000 eggs have double yolks and some people see it as good luck. Who knew?
I’ve been feeling pretty “lucky” because literally almost every egg from this carton has been a double yolker so far. But honestly, I could do without the double yolks. I don’t even eat the yolk in hard-boiled or poached eggs. And, I stay far, far away from soft-boiled eggs. Yuck. Whoever said, “I like my eggs the way I like my men: running” clearly would disagree with me. I like my eggs hard (the way I like my men?), cooked throughly, and not runny. I love eggs, just not the yolk. If you love the yolk we can be best friends. You can have my yolks and I’ll have your egg whites.
You can usually tell if an egg has two yolks by the shape of the egg itself. They’re more elongated. If you had to guess which egg is a double yolker, which one would it be? I’m betting my money on 2 and 3. 2 has an elliptical shape which equates to elongated to me. And, it’s hard to tell in the photo, but 3 is quite oval. The top doesn’t taper like most eggs. But at the rate I’ve been getting double yolks I wouldn’t be surprised if all three of them have two yolks.
That’s all yolks!
P.S. If you love eggs make sure to check out Eggslut at the Grand Central Market in Los Angeles!
Seventeenth Summer
Yesterday, a friend returned a book I lent her a couple months back. It ended up collecting dust on her table, so she missed out on a good read. Her loss.
Some of you may have read it or given it a quick glance. Seventeenth Summer, written by Maureen Daly has to be one of my favorite books and I’ve read it so many times I’ve lost track. (Is it odd that I love young adult fiction?) I first came upon this book in the 7th grade in my English teacher’s classroom library which was open for the students to borrow. I instantly fell in love with it and lied to my teacher that I lost it just so I could keep it. I’m sorry Mrs. Jackson!
‘You look nice with the wind in your hair.’ And I remember just how he said it.
Seventeenth Summer is about a 17 year old girl’s summer fling right before she leaves for college. It’s pretty obvious from the title. Their love is so innocent and I’m definitely drawn to the innocence of it all. I remember when I first read this I imagined my 17th summer to be the same: sailing out to the sunset on a boat with some hot guy I have a crush on and the wind fingering through my hair, first kiss, sticky fingers from melting ice-cream cones, parties. Oh how wrong I was to assume it would be that easy. It makes me wonder if it even exists. This pure, innocent, child-like love. Maybe I’m just a dreamer and a hopeless romantic.
Whether you’re a hopeless romantic or simply looking for an easy-read, check out this book!
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